What Are You Telling Yourself?

The majority of you (unless you have seen something similar on social media) will point out the one wrong answer, even though there are four correct answers.  The majority of thoughts are negative because we live in a society that thinks of the worst case scenario first.  We have been conditioned to notice the wrong first.  Early beliefs lay the foundation for our thoughts today.  It’s time to change that mindset.  We can do that with self-talk.

First, recognize your self-talk.  Is it mostly negative? “I can’t…” “I’ve always been told I am this…” “I’ve never been good at that.” “I got lucky.” “I want to stop (insert bad habit) but I just can’t.” And the list goes on…

Next, watch how this self-talk impacts your behavior.  So, if you say “I’m too shy” after you are asked to go to a get together, what happens? You usually don’t go or when you do go you work yourself up so much that you cannot enjoy it. You, or maybe your parents, have always told your brain you are shy.  Your brain believes it and then every time you say it, you follow it with certain behaviors (like not going to the get together).  This will then lead to feelings, attitudes, and beliefs that all keep the negative thought going.  Start telling your brain you aren’t shy.  Follow that with changed behaviors (like going anyway).  Soon you will have different feelings, attitudes, and beliefs associated with you being shy.  Start saying, “I never was…” “I’m no longer…”

This is a very brief introduction to self-talk.  I recommend you read What to Say When You Talk to Your Self by Shad Helmstetter to learn more about taking control of your inner voice.

Whether you think you can or you can’t, you are right. –Henry Ford