Mental Health Benefits of the Father-Child Bond

The father-child bond impacts mental wellbeing. Unlike the mother-child bond, which is present from the start, fathers have to engage with the child to start that attachment (skin-to-skin contact, talking, tending to the baby, eye contact). This bond impacts child development and overall mental health in later years. One study found that children with a strong bond with their fathers adopt healthy ways to manage stress and are less likely to develop a psychiatric disorder.  Children who are exposed to chaotic, harsh, or neglectful care from parents are at higher risk for having problems with anger, hostility, depression, and anxiety. Additionally, children who had poor relationships with their parents during childhood have low self-confidence and poor emotional wellbeing. Fathers are more likely to engage their child in physical and stimulating interaction during play and it is during these moments that children are developing emotion regulation and problem-solving skills. Fathers are also more likely to encourage children to take risks, while also ensuring their safety and fostering an environment where children learn to respond to unfamiliar situations and stand up for themselves. This research shows how fathers impact the development of industry and competence in adapting to new challenges, managing emotions, and handling stressful situations. Another study found that children whose fathers’ who were more aware of their children’s friends and activities were less likely to engage in risky sexual behaviors. Research notes that the influence of father’s rejection can be greater than that of a mother’s rejection. The level of one’s empathy may also be influenced by how much time their fathers spent with them as children.

It also important to note that 19.7 million children in the United States live without a father in the home. Children raised without a father are four times more likely to experience poverty, twice as likely to drop out of school, more likely to abuse drugs and alcohol, more likely to go to prison, twice as likely to become obese, and seven times more likely to become pregnant as a teen. These numbers are alarming!

While there is not a one-size-fits-all approach to becoming a more engaged father, there are ways to improve the father-child relationship. First, parents need to work together to ensure children benefit from the value of both parents. Fathers need to set aside time each day with their children, especially in play activities since this is a primary area that enhances development. Fathers role model how to father and how to be a husband/significant other. Mothers and society need to take a less critical view of fathers’ parenting roles, and instead be more positive and less judgmental. Fathers also need to be okay with breaking stereotypes. Fathers can be primary caretakers. Fathers are not just around for financial support. Fathers do want to bond with their children.  Remember, it’s never too late to be a good father. Children, even adult children, are often forgiving of parents who could have done better. Apologize. Reflect on areas you can improve. Commit to being active in your child’s life. If there are areas in your life you just cannot seem to overcome, seek professional support through therapy or support groups.

It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men. –Frederick Douglass